[james_gsx]

I've noticed I do this just before I get a break in my life. For example back in February I felt like this just before I started using real money, now I'm about to get my series 7. It's almost as if I hit the brakes before making the move.

I'm not afraid to trade when I wake up in the morning, I'm just too tired to move. I did the same thing my last year of high school maybe it is depression I don't know.

Going on a year long trip sounds like a great idea, but I don't have the kind of money to do that lol My parents wouldn't approve of it either, they view it as if I'm not in school then I should be doing something productive with my life.

I'm not very passionate about my job at Nordstrom, I like the people I work with but I have no motivation going in every morning. I'd much rather be at home trading, but I don't seem to do much of that either. I'm either a very hard, dedicated worker that doesn't stop or I just sit around and watch the world go by. There doesn't seem to be a happy medium, and it all goes in phases. I'm going to Texas Saturday to visit my sister for a week. I really think that will help get my mind off of everything.

A lot of it simply comes down to self discipline. I need it to go to bed at night, not 3 am like I usually do. I need it to push myself out of bed and not think about how comfortable my bed is. I need it to want to be successful, I have to remind myself that great things don't come easy. A trading life won't be handed to me, I have to work for it. Tonight I get home at 10, and I will make sure I'm in bed by 11 so I can get up at 5:30 tomorrow and write my trading plan. If I write the plan tonight then I will get distracted like usual and I won't go to bed until 3. If I don't follow through with this plan I am only hurting myself, so I have to ask myself how serious I really am about everything.